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Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Off the top of my head

When it comes to acts of violence, or terrorism I take a very Rhet Butler look on things.
    Any fool can destroy things, its not such a neat trick. While it makes people sad and even afraid, rest assured we are all of us thoroughly unimpressed. So for anyone who is hankering to halt the progress of humanity by blowing things up. I can think of 20 random things, off the top of my head that would be a far better use of your time...and I really mean it.    

 So here it the the list of things that is a better use of your time than blowing people up!

  1. Trying to become the world’s fattest woman
                                      Go Susanne, Go!

 2.Losing a bet and having to get breast implants
                      Yeah but his personality is for crap

3. Shellacking moose turds for use in jewelry
                                 This is a real thing

4. Becoming a karaoke super star
              She drives meh crazy! Oh! Oh! Oh! And no one care-airs!

 5. Writing doom fan fiction
                                F@#king genius!

 6. Being the Alpha Brony
                             "Want to see my basement?"

 7. Performing sexual favors to the elderly and disabled
                            Aww C'mon, throw 'em a bone!


8. Filling a jar with toenail clippings
                   What have YOU done with YOUR life, huh?

 9.Shaving the image of David Bowie as the Goblin king from the movie Labyrinth into your back hair.
                         I don't have a picture of that. But seriously could you imagine?

10. Trying to sell beads on Etsy
                          It'll probably work out

 11. Get your feelings hurt by a cat
                                             Ouch


12. Make things out of cat hair
                      Everyone has a co-worker who owns this book.


13. Read all these books
              You mean he has a mullet? And his name is McMullet too?!

 14. Mine for belly button lint
                            "Want to see my basement?"

 15. Writing this guys biography
                                    Haters gunna hate

 16. Have a fight over a Kirk Vs. Picard dispute
                                                        Sthaaawp it!

17. WHARRGARBL!
                                                                WHARRGARBL!

18. Get caught playing with your dolls
                                                    Did you see anything?!

 19.Take on something big
                             Somebody give that kid a dollar.      

20. Get help for your cookie addiction
                                        Diabetes can give you mood swings. 

                     So there you have it, that was just off the top of my head.