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Saturday, December 3, 2011

Bugs


Living in a secluded wooded area, I  thought I knew what to be wary of.
Hockey masked killers
Bald headed killer bears
People who want to use my skin for lamp shades etc.
But no, Sci-fi B movie monster bugs are what I have to contend with.  

As I was working one day, I became aware of a frantic buzzing sound. A hornet the size of an un-shelled peanut was thudding against the window trying to escape.
No one asked him to come in. 

Grabbing my fly swatter I stood there imitating ways I would take a whack at the behemoth. Admittedly, I considered what might happen if I failed to kill him. He might fly at me, or worse, he may have family that try to avenge him. How I longed for a hockey masked killer. Not to kill the hornet but to rescue me. 


 After a while I took pity on the hornet. And opened the front door, hoping he would notice and fly out.  After about ten minutes of “C’mon, over here ya dumb peanut!” He finally flew out. I felt good about it, I helped a tiny creature and get to keep my member card to the pacifists club.
Still don’t like the bugs.

 “They’re more afraid of you than you are of them.”   I don’t buy it.

Years ago, after waking one morning. I found I had a nasty spider bite on my behind. This means at some point in the night, there was a spider….ON MY ASS! So don’t tell me they’re afraid of us.  

Mostly I find spiders in laundry rooms. More than a few times I have found spiders while sorting clothes. Why are they in my laundry!? What the heck are they doing in there?


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